The Final Update... For Now

Family.  Friends. Acquaintances.

I have taken quite the hiatus from updating all of you about my cancer.  Life is actually back to normal and it is BUSY.

I finished my year long treatment in September.  I also started school again the last week of August.  So that means I went to school for two weeks while on my treatment and boy am I ever glad that I decided to take that year off while on treatment.  I was sitting in Biology and halfway through (this was on a Tuesday), I literally almost passed out.  And then I just felt like junk and couldn't concentrate at all.  I'm relieved I only had to deal with that for only two weeks!

Let me tell you though - life without treatment is 100,000,000,000,000,000 times better than life being on it.  I just didn't KNOW.  You'd think I would but that year on treatment became my "new normal."  It was just my life.  I dealt with it the best I could and lived.  I just remember a couple of weeks after my treatment was done, my mom and I were running errands together.  Target then Aldi then JoAnn Fabrics.  We got in the car at JoAnn's and I realized that we needed to go back to Target because I forgot something there.  And then I started to laugh.  Really hard too.  My mom just looked at me as if I finally had cracked.  I didn't crack.  It hit me at that moment that I wasn't TIRED.  And it made me so HAPPY.  I had energy to run back to Target to get what I needed to get.  Before, I would go grocery shopping and get halfway through the list and go home and make Jeremy do the rest because I was so freaking tired.  I don't do that now.  It's really nice.

I have patience again.  I don't feel so sluggish and I can sleep deeply at night again.  I still hate mopping my kitchen floor and wait until I can't stand it to mop it but otherwise, everything else is just so much easier to do!

I started school again and I have loved every moment of it so far (except the part where my classmates told me they read about the Challenger space shuttle exploding in their history books.  That just makes me feel old.).  I started going to a book club and love every moment of it.  Before I would have had no energy to go or read the books or hang out with my friends.  Doing stuff with kids for their school or all the extracurricular activities isn't such a chore anymore.  It can be a pain sometimes but the point is I have energy!  It's lovely.  ((sigh))

As for my cancer - I just had a CT scan done and I'm in the clear.  YAY!  I apparently have an extra spleen, which to me clearly means I'm a mutant and will be joining the X-Men as soon as they accept my application.  My super power is still listed as an unknown but only time will tell.

I will be getting another CT scan in 6 months.  In between those times, I'll be seeing my dermatologist for a head to toe mole check and Steve, my oncologist.  I'll be seeing them every three months for the next two years and then we will reassess from there.

I'm not worried.  I feel great.  I really do.  Sure, when I get aches and pains now, my first thought goes the cancer route.  If my back hurts, my brain automatically thinks, "uh-oh.  I hope that doesn't mean my cancer has spread."  That's annoying.  That will always be in my mind for the rest of my life so I guess that's my new normal.    I guess that's expected in my situation.  

THANK YOU for all of you who prayed for me, helped me out by making me smile or laugh, for sending me random texts and emails, for making me banana bread, for leaving sweet and encouraging comments, for watching my kids, for just being there for me and my family.  My thank yous always seem completely inadequate so I hope this thank you will suffice for now.  I truly am grateful.

Mmmmmwah!