Christmas Wish

For the past 5 years, I have been doing the 12 days of Christmas with my kids.  It's a fun little tradition we do and I really love doing it.  The reason why I started this particular tradition was because I wanted to focus more on my immediate family during the holiday season than have them and myself get so wrapped up on all the commercialism of the season.

Anywho...

This year of 12 days of Christmas started like all the other years.  I have a list of what we will be doing as a family each day - playing board games, visiting friends, looking at Christmas lights, etc.  On Friday, the 13th (ooooooooo), we had a movie night.  We had a chocolate fondue (yes!) and then we went through Netflix and watched Christmas movies.  The kids were laying on the living room floor watching Charlie Brown's Christmas and I was sitting on our couch, by myself, watching them watch the movie.  Then, out of the blue, E, my 8 year old, came and snuggled up to me. Then, a couple of minutes later, T, my 10 year old came and cuddled up on my other side.  I was now officially a mama sandwich.  I stretched out my arms and draped them over their shoulders.  My 4 year old, I, did not want to be left out so he literally climbed up behind me and continued to watch the movie.  Now usually, by the end of the day, the last thing I want is for my kids to invade my space.  Moms - you know what I mean.  It was late and I was still feeling the effects of the cancer shot/treatment I got the previous night.  But, what I felt at that moment will be something I will never forget and it will be something that I will cling on to when life gets rough.

I felt LOVE and PEACE.

I was sitting there, snuggling with my kids and the thought came to me that this could have been my last Christmas with them.  I'm not trying to be morbid - I'm just being real.  When you are diagnosed with what could be a life threatening disease, such as cancer, it makes you stop and reflect a lot more than when you are healthy and things are going well in life.  I love those moments of clarity and humbleness.  I'm grateful I keep getting these 2nd chances of life.  Really grateful.  And oh my gosh, do I ever love my kids!  In that moment of snuggliness, I did not want to let them go and I wanted that moment to last forever.

I don't know what the future holds in store for me.  We are all cautiously optimistic that I will fight these darn cooties to their death.  But for now, I will continue to live each day as full as I can and I will take advantage of those sandwich moments with my kids.  So, our Christmas wish to you is the same - find those sandwich moments and savor them!  We love you and we thank you for all your prayers and love.

MERRY CHRISTMAS!!!!!

I, E, T, K (front)

Studman Jeremy and Cancer Fighting Gorgeous Me (back)