Tuesdays.
Tuesdays are hard.
All day I am tired.
So very tired.
I'm hot, then I'm cold.
And my skin HURTS. I don't know why that always surprises me. But, it does. Every time.
I woke up this morning and went into the living room. My two older kids were up with their dad reading a chapter in the scriptures before the start of our day. I did not read anything. My hood of my sweatshirt was pulled up over my head and all I wanted to do was lay back down and sleep. I forced myself up off the couch and went into the kitchen to take my synthroid (the medicine I take every day to replace the thyroid hormone that my body no longer makes). I longingly looked at my blessed Tylenol. I have to wait at least 30 minutes after taking my synthroid before taking anything else. Gah. Who knew 30 minutes can feel like an eternity?
After T and E got on the bus today for school, I was sad and was crying and I had to dig deep to find that motherly love to comfort and soothe him. He leaned up against me and since my body was all out of whack from my cancer treatment the night before, it hurt for him to touch me. But, he needed my touch so I dug deep and held him until he was better. I do not like to dig deep. It's tiring.
I sat on the couch literally waiting for the Tylenol to finally kick in. That usually takes another 30 minutes. During that 30 minutes, I wanted to play a game that I have been telling him we could play for the past week. I dug deep again and played the game. He LOVED it. He smiled and cheered when he won. And yes, it made me smile. I was not too tired to smile.
My day wasn't all that bad. I actually figured that out only after a text I received from my cousin that said,
"You made it through another Tuesday!"
Then I started thinking about the rest of my day. I got a text from a very good friend of mine with her new number since she moved. We texted back and forth for a while and it was very uplifting. Seriously, I love that girl. Then one of our friends came over just to be another adult in the house while my husband worked. It was so nice. The kids love her and she's really good at distracting them so I can get some much needed rest. Then, of course, I had my daily long phone conversation with my bestie. She made me laugh a lot and we talked about a lot of stuff and it felt good. I then gave my son I a mohawk. Seriously. It's not that great but he thinks he's cool. I even took a shower today! And then put my pajamas back on. :) I also received a bit of energy and made cupcakes. Then another good friend came over with dinner. Yes. DINNER. And her famous banana bread. Oh my gosh. I was and still am in heaven.
I told my cousin that I "barely" made it through the day. But, reflecting back on today and the choices that I could control and made, I didn't "barely" make it through the day. I "conquered" the day. Oooo...I really like the thought of "conquering." My house is a quasi mess. There are 3 baskets of laundry to fold and put away. There are dishes in the sink. My kitchen floor is in desperate need of a good mop. So on and so forth...And so what. Today I made a child happy. Today I made cupcakes for crying out loud. Today I was reminded that although I have to go through this, I have friends and family cheering me on and lifting me up. And, I also have amazing banana bread. Mmmmm...
So bring it Tuesdays! I'm ready to conquer another day!
